Coincidence or destiny? -4

 EPISODE 4

SIYA

Finally after 2 days, New day, new morning, a fresh start. Forgetting all the sorrows and regrets, I'm here in this world to start my life again. To get over someone who is special to you is not a piece of cake. It doesn't matter whatever that person has done, it's still difficult to forget everything. In these few days, I realized that one should never develop unnecessary feelings for someone. Appearance is just phantasm. A person is known by his deeds and not external features. Thanks to Ryan who supported me despite of being a stranger. He said, "Just focus on your goals and start bettering yourself. Only that thing is in your control. You can't control anybody's feelings but at least you can take charge of your responsibilities and better your own life." After reading this message, my tear glands stopped releasing tears and I got up on my own with the courage in my heart and goals in my mind.

After when school dispersed, we sat inside the van and it started releasing toxic gases from the exhaust pipe which is a consequence of leaded petrol use. The exhaust spread in the air and I covered my mouth and nose with a hanker chief all the way towards home. When the van was 5 minutes far from my home, an auto rikshaw passed from the side of our van and my unintentional eyes saw a boy. I remembered him. I don't know how, but I remembered him. The memory centers of my brain activated and I started recalling his face with someone I know. Who's he? Who's he? Have I seen him anywhere else? Yes. Or no., my brain cells argued with each other. On getting back to home, I picked up the phone, opened my instagram account, opened Ryan's profile and checked out his photos. He's him! , my brain cells screamed after stopping the on going argument. He was that creep boy. Still my brain wires were tangled up and I was not sure whether Ryan is that creep boy or not. I send a message to him saying: "Hey, Ryan. I was just curious to know that in which school you're studying?". That boy's school uniform was of 'Panchsheel public school'. Ryan's reply will help me to confirm my assumption. After a moment of time, our conversation started like this:

_.Ryan._: Hi Siya. I go to 'Panchsheel public school'. Any reason?

Siya143: Actually, I feel I've seen you somewhere but I can't recall.

_.Ryan._: Well, frankly speaking I've seen you few weeks back.

Siya143: Oh is it? Where?

_.Ryan._: In a school van.

Siya143: Okay.

Confirmed! He's him!, I told myself. Still he doesn't seem like a creep boy. He's sweet and matured by his talks. I can continue talking to him. 

Two weeks later

I must say, Ryan is the nicest boy whom I've ever came across. He makes me laugh, learn, smile and every possible feeling which a human on this planet can get. He supports me in bad times too. Few days back I got my half yearly exam results. I entered the class room on Parents-teacher meeting day and my class teacher said, "I didn't expected this result, Siya." She passed me the progress card in front of my parents with a dispiriting face and my limbs got cold as if I was standing in the Himalayas. I opened the card and saw the numbers written in the left bottom side: 62%. I was in shock. My parents and I were quite all the way towards home. I reached home and picked up the phone to inform Ryan about the results. The chat was like :

_.Ryan._: I'm damn sure you've scored very well. You've told me how you used to get straight As in every class. Well, what's the score?

Siya143: 62%😭

_.Ryan._: Oh. Don't cry it's okay.

Siya143: What okay? Nothing is okay! 62% means C grade, not A grade! I've never ever got a C. It's so disappointing and depressing.

_.Ryan._: Depressing? Are you out your mind? Life doesn't end after just one failure, Siya. Wipe your tears, chin up and try harder! Don't sit back and cry. It'll become a terrible habit and you won't be able to do anything! Just find out your mistakes and try again.

Siya143: I think you're right. I need some time. I'll be okay.

That's how he keeps me motivated. Till now, I feel confident in almost every aspect of life and I like this. I guess Ryan and I can be good friends.

RYAN

The sun was going down and I walked through the streets on the way towards a place where our friends meet. It's a general store with an area for sitting. I sat on the rocks, picked up my phone without thinking; it's an unconditional reflex. My right thumb naturally opened the chat of Siya143. Few moments passed and I realised that Siya and I have chatted a lot since few weeks. I thought it can be the appropriate time to propose her. Still, the two sides of me (angel and devil) argued. Sometimes I hallucinate the "Angel me" sitting in my right and the "Devil me" on the left. It's definitely the consequence of over-watching movies. The argument goes like: 

Devil me: You'll never get a girl like her. She's so innocent, she'll never say 'no' to you!

Angel me: She's innocent but you both have not even met.

Devil me: It doesn't matter!

Angel me: It matters. You both have to know each other.

Devil me: They have already talked a lot, dude! Now it's the time!

Angel me: No, you're going fast. Plus it's not your age.

Devil me: It is the age to enjoy!

I covered my ears with my both hands preventing the voice of the imaginary argument in my mind. Without finding a conclusion, I unlocked my phone and came across a conversation with Siya.

_.Ryan._: You told me about the "sanskari boy" incident, right?

Siya143: Yeah. So, what?

_.Ryan._: If you hate that pack of 3 words, then why your user name is Siya143?😂 You're hypocritic, aren't you?

Siya143: Actually, my friend forced me to have that username😅 but I don't care now. It's okay. I realized, I was over reacting on that "sanskari boy". Well I've now forgotten everything, so I don't want to talk about anything from my past.

_.Ryan._: Okay, command accepted mam!🙇

Siya143: Aah. Okay!😂😅 

_.Ryan._: 😁

Siya143: I like the way you talk. You seem to be a nice person.

_.Ryan._: I'm just being transparent. I'm nice to nice people. And you're a kind girl:-)

Siya143: Oh. Is it. 

_.Ryan._: I like you... as a friend.

Siya143:  Really? Am I that good? 

_.Ryan._: Actually...

Siya143: ???

_.Ryan._: I love you.

Siya143: What?! 

_.Ryan._: Yes. From the day when I saw you.

Siya143: Umm... I don't know what to say.

_.Ryan._: It's okay. I just told you what I feel. I'm not pressurizing you.

Siya143: Okay. But I really don't know what I'm feeling. I just need some time to understand it.

_.Ryan._: Take your time. Don't rush. 

Siya143: Okay, if possible I'll let you know in 2 days.

_.Ryan._: Okay no problem;-)

I sighed and went to home without thinking a word. The moment when I placed my head over the pillow, her face flashed in front of me. I drowned in the sea of thoughts about her and slept so peacefully for the first time in my life. No anxiety, no nervousness about her answer. I just want her to be my friend, if she don't agree to be in a relationship. I hope that our destiny has something good for both of us and I accept that.